Category Archives: changes

Here We Go Again…

I’ve written twice about Finn’s brother and SIL  (sister-in-law) already. Here and here

While we were out shopping for wedding supplies Saturday, Finn’s mom called to ask about our plans. He told her that we were waiting to finalize the venue before we dove too far into the decorations. Fair enough. 

She goes on to say that SIL wants to help with the decorations. 

FULL STOP. 

NO. 

This makes me feel even more suspicious. It feels like she wants to live vicariously through me, since she never had an actual wedding and reception. 

I rolled my eyes sooo hard when Finn told me. He gets it. Our tastes are vastly different. She wants a $26k ring vs my less-than-$100 moissanite bridal set. 

We’ve been told no less than four times that she wants to help, and I feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. I don’t want her anywhere near the crafty end of the decorations. I’ve put a lot of thought into what I want, and being naturally crafty, I don’t trust anyone else to do it to my standards. 

Yes, I realize that makes me sound like a bitch and a bridezilla, but it’s the truth. I take a lot of pride in my craft work. It’s kind of my gig. I have been paid for my creations. Once upon a time, I had two active online shops. So yeah, it’s safe to say that I’m good at what I do. 

So, onto yesterday…

I fucked up. SIL caught me in a moment of weakness (dealing with some pain from a splinter IN MY ASS. Seriously, it hurts to sit on any surface that’s not heavily cushioned. You have my permission to laugh), and I gave her the link to my Pinterest wedding board.

She’s running with it. And for some weird ass reason I’ve yet to figure out, she’s pushing bamboo cutlery. Like, fuck, let me breathe. Finn and I are paying for this whole gig out of our own pockets. 

No Pay, No Say. 

Suggestions are all well and good, but in the end, Finn and I have final say. I don’t want this wedding to become a three ring circus. My last wedding, the in-laws took over, and it ended up being almost completely the opposite of what I wanted. 

Fuck, just let us have the wedding we want. Damn. 

Still looking for volunteers for ‘red wine duty.’ 

Any takers??

Suspicion Confirmed…

Finn’s brother and sister-in-law just stopped by, thinking he was home  (nope, he’s a workaholic, works approximately 53 hours a week). They mentioned they were (finally) looking at wedding rings. They just had to mention that the rings they’re planning on getting are $16k a peice.

SIXTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS FOR A HUNK OF METAL AND ROCKS TO WEAR AROUND YOUR FINGER

I’m seriously dumbfounded hearing this. And then. AND THEN. She speaks up and says it’s too small.

TOO SMALL? A SIXTEEN THOUSAND DOLLAR RING IS TOO SMALL?!?! That’s, at the very least, a 3cttw diamond. Seriously. 

The ring she wants is twenty-six thousand dollars. Holy shit! That’s a house in this area. She’d rather have a ring than a house?!?

As I said in this post, she’s been acting weird whenever my ring, or Finn and I’s wedding is brought up. I thought it was jealousy, but now I’m about 99.999% sure that’s exactly what it is/was. 

They’re (or, at the very least, her) attempting to show us up. I’m hoping (PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD) that this shit is out of their system before Finn and I’s wedding. 

I’m definitely assigning someone to red wine (Gatorade?) duty. 

Overwhelmed is an Understatement… 

I had a meeting with the school district’s Eligibility Committee this morning, and Z officially has his Individual Education Plan (IEP) for being gifted. 

Since we’re at the tail end of the school year (three weeks to go!), it’ll come into effect when he starts middle school at the end of August. 

But, holy crap, it’s been one helluva year, and we’re not even halfway through it yet. 

  • Z’s surgery
  • My divorce
  • Z being placed in all honors classes next year
  • Our engagement 
  • Z being vetted as gifted. 

We can only hope this year continues on this path. 

So… Um… Time to plan a wedding… 

So… Yeah… Finn and I are officially engaged, and my head is spinning. 

One thing we agree on (thank goodness!!!), is that we want a small wedding. Twenty people or less. 


Off to Pinterest…

Expanded Our Family… 

By four little fuzzy feet. 


Meet Phoenix:



He’s simply been a joy to have in our home. He’s a sweet little fuzzbutt. And when he’s hyped up, his little bobtail gets to wagging, causing me to giggle every time. 

We tossed around a few names for him, but Phoenix stuck, mainly for the symbolism. In mythology, a phoenix is a bird that bursts into flames when it’s time to die, and is then reborn from the ashes. 

Another Step Forward…

Recieved the letter for our final court hearing for the divorce to be finalized… 

On Thursday, February 23rd, it’ll be finalized, and I’ll have my life back. 

Emotionally Exhausting Week

The past week has been a roller coaster ride of emotions; my head is still all over the place. 

Tuesday, January 17th 

   – filed for my divorce from STBXH

   – Z came home from school complaining of stomach pains


Wednesday, January 18th

   -kept Z home from school, he got progressively worse as the day went on

   – called 911 for an ambulance to take us to the hospital

   – diagnosis of appendicitis 


Thursday, January 19th

   – emergency appendectomy. No rupture, but a LOT of pus in his abdomen. 

   – due to said pus, there’s a risk of secondary infection. Extra time in the hospital. 

Friday,  January 20th

   – got a text from STBXH saying that he’d been served with the divorce papers. 


We were in the hospital until yesterday, and Z’s home til Wednesday. I’ve received a crap ton of phone calls and messages of support and concern. Including from Z’s teacher and a classmate’s mom. It’s been amazing. 

I spent the whole ambulance ride to the hospital second guessing myself, after the EMTs said it could be as simple as severe constipation. Clearly, my mother’s intuition was in full force Wednesday evening. I don’t want to think about what could have happened had I not gotten him to the hospital when I did. (Hint: it could have ended VERY badly.)

Finn was amazing during all of this. He left work early to be with us in the ER Wednesday, and sat with me while Z was in surgery. He only left the hospital to go to work, and came straight back as soon as he got off. Words cannot express how much that meant to Z and I. 


Random Thoughts Tuesday 10/25/16

My thoughts are currently here and there and everywhere else. 


Finn and I have been together for over a year and a half now, and we’re both ready to move onto the next step. There’s only one thing stopping us…


I’m still legally married to STBXH.  It’s driving me crazy. We’ve been separated for well over two years. My life has been on hold since the day I walked out. 


I’ll be 34 in a month and a half. I’m ready for my forever with Finn to officially begin. We’ve already accomplished so much together as a couple. We literally started at rock bottom, and now we’re buying a home together. 


I cannot wait for my divorce to be finalized, so Finn and I can begin our forever. 

Update to last week’s Monday Bitchfest


Since my last post, STBXH decided to send me a check for $100 to go towards the divorce. Because of time restraints, I haven’t been able to try to cash it just yet. 


I’m really hoping it’s a legit check, and that this truly is the beginning of the end of the divorce so Finn and I can continue with our plans. 

Unofficially Official

As we were walking out the door to go to my Aunt K’s house Saturday afternoon, Finn called me his future wife (I can’t for the life of me remember the context).

Basically, we’re currently considering ourselves engaged, but not making it official until my divorce from STBXH goes through.